Now, by 2005, Steven Seagal's career was already past its peak. Nonetheless, this was the year he announced the release of Lightning Bolt, the so-called "Asian Experience energy drink" ... and the world collectively collapsed with mocking laughter. According to Adweek, Seagal claimed that he'd personally backpacked through Asia in search of the drink's ethereal ingredients, resulting in a beverage that held "untold power." These ingredients, according to Gizmodo, included green tea (so mystical, huh?), Tibetan goji berry, gingko biloba, and Asian cordyceps, a combination which led to Seagal boasting that, "I have traveled the world creating this drink; there is none better." And you could have it all for the price of one $2.99 can.
What, you're thinking this was a spoof? Nah. A guy inflated with the gargantuan self-importance of Steven Seagal could never intentionally be so goofy. Just to make sure, though, Gawker did double-check and confirmed that Lightning Bolt was a real drink. Lest you think all the Asian stereotypes bundled up in this weren't offensive (and uncomfortable) enough, Lightning Bolt's painfully bad commercials also injected quite a bit of misogyny into the proceedings, as they featured bikini-clad women, framed as Seagal's employees, being made to swim in a pool full of Lightning Bolt, while Seagal himself generally acted smug and creepy with them.
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